Dear Dumb Diary Series by Jim Benton, Jamie Kelly

Read the hilarious, candid, (and sometimes not-so-nice,) diaries of Jamie Kelly, who promises that everything in her diary is true...or at least as true as it needs to be.School was okay today. Actually, it was better than okay... moreRead the hilarious, candid, (and sometimes not-so-nice,) diaries of Jamie Kelly, who promises that everything in her diary is true...or at least as true as it needs to be.School was okay today. Actually, it was better than okay. Angeline got her long, beautiful hair tangled in one of the jillion things she has dangling from her backpack, and the school nurse -- who is now one of my main heroes -- took a pair of scissors and snipped two feet of silky blond hair from the left side of her head, so now Angeline only looks like The Prettiest Girl in the World if you're standing on her right. (Although personally, I think she would look better if I was standing on her neck.) less

Read the hilarious, candid (and sometimes not-so-nice), diaries of Jamie Kelly, who promises that everything in her diary is true -- or at least as true as it needs to be.They were just a soft, ordinary pair of thrift-shop jeans until Jamie Kelly tried them on . . . Then they became a tight, scratchy, slightly smelly, and utterly ordinary pair of thrift-shop jeans with an embarrassing haunting problem... moreRead the hilarious, candid (and sometimes not-so-nice), diaries of Jamie Kelly, who promises that everything in her diary is true -- or at least as true as it needs to be.They were just a soft, ordinary pair of thrift-shop jeans until Jamie Kelly tried them on . . . Then they became a tight, scratchy, slightly smelly, and utterly ordinary pair of thrift-shop jeans with an embarrassing haunting problem. Do the pants have the power to soothe a vengeful beagle, vanquish The Prettiest Girl in the World, or make the wearer irresistible to the eighth cutest guy in the grade? Are the haunted pants so dazzling they can hurt and maybe permanently damage the eyes of onlookers? Or are the haunted pants just, well, haunted (which is kind of gross when you think about it)? less

Jamie is crushing on Hudson. Someone too-gross-to-be- named is crushing on Jamie. And Hudson is crushing on . . . Princess Turd of Turdsylvania (a.k.a. The Prettiest Girl in the World). Middle school may be grim, but it's no fairy tale. And crazy doesn't even begin to cover it."Dear Dumb Diary,I got another poem today from You-Know-Who'She is the fairest blossom, true,She blooms in any weather.But I must love her from afar.We'll never be together.'Signed,M.P... moreJamie is crushing on Hudson. Someone too-gross-to-be- named is crushing on Jamie. And Hudson is crushing on . . . Princess Turd of Turdsylvania (a.k.a. The Prettiest Girl in the World). Middle school may be grim, but it's no fairy tale. And crazy doesn't even begin to cover it."Dear Dumb Diary,I got another poem today from You-Know-Who'She is the fairest blossom, true,She blooms in any weather.But I must love her from afar.We'll never be together.'Signed,M.P.Can you believe the pain he's in? His suffering? The crushing heartache he endures every time he sees me? Gosh, it just makes me so happy " less

Jim Benton's tales from Mackerel Middle School.

Read the hilarious, candid (and sometimes not-so-nice), diaries of Jamie Kelly, who promises that everything in her diary is true...or at least as true as it needs to be.Dear Dumb Diary,My social studies teacher, Mr. VanDoy, never smiles. I know that's hard to believe, because everybody smiles about something, right?Isabella smiles when her brothers get in trouble. Angeline smiles when she thinks about how much prettier she is than, like, a waterfall or a unicorn... moreRead the hilarious, candid (and sometimes not-so-nice), diaries of Jamie Kelly, who promises that everything in her diary is true...or at least as true as it needs to be.Dear Dumb Diary,My social studies teacher, Mr. VanDoy, never smiles. I know that's hard to believe, because everybody smiles about something, right?Isabella smiles when her brothers get in trouble. Angeline smiles when she thinks about how much prettier she is than, like, a waterfall or a unicorn. I smile when I think about a unicorn kicking Angeline over a waterfall. But Mr. VanDoy doesn't smile at all. I wonder if when you become an adult, you can lose your sense of humor the way you lose your teeth or hair or fashion sense. less

Everyone's favorite Mackerel Middle-Schooler, Jamie Kelly, is back with another hilarious, candid (and sometimes not-so-nice) diary!There's a new girl in at Mackerel Middle School.Colette is friendly, fabulous, smart, totally talented, and an all-around amazing individual. She is more brilliantly diabolical than Isabella, as blindly loyal as Stinker, and even harder-to-resist than Angeline. It's enough to make Jamie throw up a little... moreEveryone's favorite Mackerel Middle-Schooler, Jamie Kelly, is back with another hilarious, candid (and sometimes not-so-nice) diary!There's a new girl in at Mackerel Middle School.Colette is friendly, fabulous, smart, totally talented, and an all-around amazing individual. She is more brilliantly diabolical than Isabella, as blindly loyal as Stinker, and even harder-to-resist than Angeline. It's enough to make Jamie throw up a little. And Jamie just can't help but wonder: Is it humanly possible for a girl to be more perfectly perfect than the most perfect girl in the world? less

The wedding between Jamie's aunt and Angeline's uncle is nearing, and they will be joined together until death--or a much-wished-for divorce. Now, three of Jamie's most dreaded nightmares are about to be combined into one unbearable event. Illustrations.

New York Times Bestselling author Jamie Kelly is back with another hilarious, candid, and sometimes not-so-nice diary!Dear Dumb Diary,I went back and read some of my very oldest diaries. The entries say things like "I eated salad dressing" and "I got a Barbie shoe stuck in Stinker's nose again" and "The vet was mean to me about the Barbie shoe so I tried to bite him but vets are quick at not getting bit because dogs try all the time but dogs don't usually kick so I did that... moreNew York Times Bestselling author Jamie Kelly is back with another hilarious, candid, and sometimes not-so-nice diary!Dear Dumb Diary,I went back and read some of my very oldest diaries. The entries say things like "I eated salad dressing" and "I got a Barbie shoe stuck in Stinker's nose again" and "The vet was mean to me about the Barbie shoe so I tried to bite him but vets are quick at not getting bit because dogs try all the time but dogs don't usually kick so I did that."What amazed me was just how dumb I used to be, considering how smart I am now. There must have been a day when I just woke up smart.Book Details: Format: Paperback Publication Date: 3/1/2009 Pages: 131 Reading Level: Age 8 and Up less

Bestselling author Jamie Kelly is back with an all-new, all-funny diary! But she has no idea that anybody is reading it. So please, please, please don't tell her.Dear Dumb Diary,So now I'm friends with Angeline. This is automatic friendship, and I have to just accept it and make the best of things... moreBestselling author Jamie Kelly is back with an all-new, all-funny diary! But she has no idea that anybody is reading it. So please, please, please don't tell her.Dear Dumb Diary,So now I'm friends with Angeline. This is automatic friendship, and I have to just accept it and make the best of things. See, if I objected, then Aunt Carol might divorce Angeline's uncle, sending both of them tumbling into a deep pit of depression for the rest of their lives, and Angeline could wind up feeling so guilty that she would have to go be locked up in an old dirty insane asylum for years and years, and Stinker's puppies could grow up not knowing both their parents --- and I couldn't live with myself for doing something like that to a puppy. less

School's out for the summer, and that means no more Meat Loaf Thursdays, Sunday homework-cramming, or teachers (unsuccessfully) trying to act cool. It also means that certain Mackerel Middle Schoolers have a lot of time on their hands . . . and seriously empty pockets. Original.

There are more than 5 million Dear Dumb Diary books in print!Bestselling author Jamie Kelly is back with an all-new, all-funny diary! But she has no idea that anybody is reading it. So please, please, please don't tell her.Dear Dumb Diary,I went five whole days without seeing or hearing from Angeline. I was beginning to get used to it. It's true that I have learned to overlook many of Angeline's flaws, like her flawlessness, but she can still be difficult to be around... moreThere are more than 5 million Dear Dumb Diary books in print!Bestselling author Jamie Kelly is back with an all-new, all-funny diary! But she has no idea that anybody is reading it. So please, please, please don't tell her.Dear Dumb Diary,I went five whole days without seeing or hearing from Angeline. I was beginning to get used to it. It's true that I have learned to overlook many of Angeline's flaws, like her flawlessness, but she can still be difficult to be around. Like when she's lit perfectly, for example.To my extreme credit, I have learned to pretend to ignore Angeline's failure to not be perfect. less

Bestselling author Jim Benton is back, with a brand-new spin on a favorite series!Dear Dumb Diary is a hilarious hit! Now after 12 books (each covering a month of her life), Jamie Kelly's upcoming diaries have a fresh look and a fun twist. It's Dear Dumb Diary: Year Two! The diary entries are still laugh-out-loud funny -- but this is a whole new beginning... moreBestselling author Jim Benton is back, with a brand-new spin on a favorite series!Dear Dumb Diary is a hilarious hit! Now after 12 books (each covering a month of her life), Jamie Kelly's upcoming diaries have a fresh look and a fun twist. It's Dear Dumb Diary: Year Two! The diary entries are still laugh-out-loud funny -- but this is a whole new beginning. Everything is another year dumber!As Jamie grapples with school, grades, and middle school's Big Questions, don't miss even more of her words of wisdom like, "If someone is really, really intelligent, it would be polite if they would ugly it up a bit before they left the house."(Jamie STILL has no idea that anybody is reading her diary. So please, please, please don't tell her.) less

Do NOT read Jamie Kelly's top-secret diaries!"Sometimes it amazes me how ingenious I am about everything." --Jamie KellyWe've been with Jamie Kelly through her search for inner beauty, poofy bridesmaid dresses, and desperate attempts to make money during summer vacation... moreDo NOT read Jamie Kelly's top-secret diaries!"Sometimes it amazes me how ingenious I am about everything." --Jamie KellyWe've been with Jamie Kelly through her search for inner beauty, poofy bridesmaid dresses, and desperate attempts to make money during summer vacation. Along the way, she's left us with countless gems of wisdom, such "If somebody ever asks you to kick her in the face, the first thing she will do is forget that she asked you to do it," and "As long as you keep laughing at how dumb something is, you can secretly enjoy it without risking your cool."Now Jamie's upcoming diaries have a fresh look and a fun twist. It's Dear Dumb Year Two! The diary entries are still laugh-out-loud funny -- but this is a whole new beginning. Everything is another year dumber!(But Jamie STILL has no idea that anybody is reading her diary. So please, please, please don't tell her.) less

Whatever you do, DON'T read Jamie Kelly's bestselling diaries!The bestselling Dear Dumb Diary series is a hilarious hit! Now Jamie Kelly's diaries have a fresh look and a fun twist... moreWhatever you do, DON'T read Jamie Kelly's bestselling diaries!The bestselling Dear Dumb Diary series is a hilarious hit! Now Jamie Kelly's diaries have a fresh look and a fun twist. Dear Dumb Diary Year Two is still laugh-out-loud funny -- but everything is another year dumber!As Jamie continues to grapple with middle school's Big Questions, she drops even more snarky gems of wisdom like, "Everybody knows that the more you love somebody, the less you try to look nice for them," and "People don't appreciate how much willpower it takes to do the wrong thing."(But Jamie STILL has no idea that anybody is reading her diary. So please, please, please don't tell her.) less

The hilarious and bestselling series from Jim Benton continues!Jamie, Isabella, and Angeline have known each other for a long time. They've even become friends -- whether Jamie likes it or not. But when the trio starts a friendly competition, all bets are off. The loser will be treated to a game of Dare or Worse Dare... with Isabella. (And Jamie's pretty sure that's like having a banana-peeling contest with a starving monkey. The monkey always wins.) What could go wrong? Probably everything... moreThe hilarious and bestselling series from Jim Benton continues!Jamie, Isabella, and Angeline have known each other for a long time. They've even become friends -- whether Jamie likes it or not. But when the trio starts a friendly competition, all bets are off. The loser will be treated to a game of Dare or Worse Dare... with Isabella. (And Jamie's pretty sure that's like having a banana-peeling contest with a starving monkey. The monkey always wins.) What could go wrong? Probably everything. And it's probably all that blondwad Angeline's fault. Probably. Jamie still has no idea that anyone is reading her diary, so please, please, please don't tell her. And definitely don't tell her that she's the star of her very own Dear Dumb Diary movie, available on DVD. (Her glamorous ego might not be able to handle it.) less

The hilarious and bestselling series from Jim Benton continues!It's not easy being a middle-schooler, and nobody knows that better than Jamie Kelly. There are surprises around every some good, some bad, all dumb. But when Jamie inherits a trunk of her grandmother's things, she never expects to find the biggest surprise of all -- Grandma's diary.Violating the privacy of a diary is something Jamie would never do . . . unless she was absolutely certain that she wanted to do it... moreThe hilarious and bestselling series from Jim Benton continues!It's not easy being a middle-schooler, and nobody knows that better than Jamie Kelly. There are surprises around every some good, some bad, all dumb. But when Jamie inherits a trunk of her grandmother's things, she never expects to find the biggest surprise of all -- Grandma's diary.Violating the privacy of a diary is something Jamie would never do . . . unless she was absolutely certain that she wanted to do it.And when she does, she learns that, deep down, everyone is exactly the same. Dumb.Jamie still has no idea that anyone is reading her diary, so please, please, please don't tell her. And definitely don't tell her that she's the star of her very own Dear Dumb Diary movie, available on DVD. (Her glamorous ego might not be able to handle it.) less