Noah Can't Even Series by Simon James Green

Painfully geeky Noah Grimes thinks his best chance at social normalcy is to strike up a romance with Sophie. But his delusional plans are hopelessly derailed when his best (and only) friend Harry kisses him at a party. That's when things go from bad to utter chaos.

Noah and Harry have gone from friends to boyfriends, but is Noah ready for the difference?It doesn't help that a group of French exchange students have descended on Little Fobbing - including sexy Pierre Victoire, who seems to have his eye on Harry. Meanwhile, Noah's paired up with a girl, who, outrageously, is German not even French!But that's not all: Noah's being followed! By mysterious strangers in a black car!Is it because:A... moreNoah and Harry have gone from friends to boyfriends, but is Noah ready for the difference?It doesn't help that a group of French exchange students have descended on Little Fobbing - including sexy Pierre Victoire, who seems to have his eye on Harry. Meanwhile, Noah's paired up with a girl, who, outrageously, is German not even French!But that's not all: Noah's being followed! By mysterious strangers in a black car!Is it because:A. Noah's dad and secret half-brother have stolen gran's fake diamonds?B. His PE teacher is getting suspicious cash infusions from Russia? C. A drag queen is hiding out at Noah's house after a bare-knuckled drag feud? D. Noah's made some questionable life choices involving protein powder?E. Or NONE ALL OF THE ABOVE?! less

Noah Grimes is back, in a new, original short story!Noah is v excited: his class have been shipped off to a hotel in the Lake District to study a nearby Nuclear Power Station! On arrival, all Noah wants to do is settle in to his crisp hotel sheets and get proper rest, but his conniving secret half-brother Eric Smith has other plans. Soon everyone is sneaking in and out of their rooms, sending Noah into a Tailspin...There’s only so much Noah can’t take!